Muahaha, what up kids? I’m still hangin around, and hopefully you are too! I know it’s been over a month since I’ve been around, but because I am clearly a crazy person, I moved. Again. Yes, I just moved six months ago, but you see, a certain someone offered up his home to me. (All the baked goods and pasta worked.) And when someone offers you a home without uncomplicated roommates, you go for it. Plus, he’s a pretty good snuggler. Oh, and he takes out the trash, and kills bugs! And he kinda likes me, and I kinda like him a whole lot too. Win-win, no?

Anyway, I’ve been doing super fun things like painting trim, transforming what were blue (!) cabinets into chocolate brown, and putting Parker in his new big boy bed. And as you can see, my stove hasn’t always been you know, plugged into the wall.  We’re also having a totally awesome haunted housewarming this weekend, which means I get to make super cool and classy food like Jack o Lanterns puking guacamole, and hot dogs wrapped in dough like mummies, and ladies’ fingers. Ahem.

Maybe you should be glad I haven’t been posting…

Continue reading ‘you only get what you give’

So I don’t know if you’ve noticed yet, but my life so far is pretty much just a big ol’ bag of excuses.

“How come you’re late, Meleyna?”
“Uh, I don’t set an alarm since Parker wakes up so early and he slept late today and so did I!” (Really, “I drank a bottle of wine for dinner last night, and really couldn’t get myself moving this morning.  And really, do you need to be talking so loud?  My head is pounding.  Yeah, thanks.”)

“Where’s this week’s lesson plan, Meleyna?”
“I totally have it right here (waves last week’s lesson plan around) I just haven’t had time to copy it yet!” (Really, “I just can’t seem to ever get my shit together.”)

“Why didn’t you finish college, Meleyna?”
“Uh, I got knocked up.”

So you see, my dear friends, while I may not have been around sharing fantastical recipes, what I do have for you is a big ol’ bag of baloney in the form of an excuse of being just plain busy. But, here I am, and with cake.  Twelve layers of cake.  You still love me, right?

Continue reading ‘this one takes the cake’

Hi, kids!  I promise I’m alive, though barely after all the alcohol I consumed this weekend.  Oy.  Between Parker’s birthday party last weekend (cake post coming soon!), and the holiday this past one, I’ve been one busy chickie.  My grandma took Parker alllll last week, so I figured hey, I’m not responsible for anyone else’s actions this week, why should I be responsible for my own?  Tommy had friends in town, so we decided to take them on a five night tour of the shitshow that is Scottsdale nightlife. Continue reading ‘bacon makes it better’

So you know when you’re in a super great relationship?  Things are all puppies and daisies and rainbows, and you cook and bake to impress him and things are all la-di-da-di-da.  And when you’re not knocking boots his socks off with your crazy skills in the kitchen, he’s taking you out for romantic meals at places you’ve always wanted to go to but could never trick anyone into taking you to.  And then he gets your magical presents like a KitchenAid and you start going crazy with this whole baked goods thing.  Fast forward a year later, and you step on the scale, and your perky little 105 pound nurse chirps your weight, to which my response is “Clearly, you had crack for breakfast, which not only explains your back ribs poking through your scrubs, but how you got that number when obviously I weight ten pounds less than that.” Either that or I just silently screamed HOLY LORD I AM A COW! in my head and blamed it on my 15 pound purse.  Which was technically sitting on the floor but whatever, the strap totally could’ve fallen onto the scale. Continue reading ‘weighty issues’

Hi!  Remember me?  I blog!  (Well, if you can call it that.  More like ramble, but well, you know…  Kinda like this, see?  I’m a pro!)  Um, so yeah, thanks to those fantabulous people over at We Fix WordPress Blogs, I’m back bitches!  Also, ever since I typed “I’m baaaaack” up there, I’ve had this song in my head from We’re Back!.  You know, that animated dinosaur movie from the early 90’s?  C’mon, you know what I’m talking about, right?  Ahem. As pertinent as that information was to this post, this is a food blog, so, onto the food!

Continue reading ‘i’m baaaaack!’